Monday, April 16, 2007

What would you do for a Red Bull?

The sheer horror that is life in the greatest city in America took a turn for the personal today. After a morning spent reading Baltiless crime logs and The Baltimore Sun (same thing), I went out to my car to discover that the rear passenger window had been smashed. The perpetrator had helpfully left the cinderblock he'd used in the back seat to allay any confusion about what might have happened.

Surprisingly, the car was still there. All the electronics were still intact. It appears our nighttime forager hadn't allowed himself to be distracted by those other temptations- he'd kept his eyes on the prize
and it had paid off. For his troubles, he scored some loose change and- here's the kicker- a can of sugar-free Red Bull.

Double-fisting a treasure trove like that, is it any wonder he hung up his cinder block and quit for the night?

1 comment:

Thomas said...

awesome. your car is now adding to baltiless' decrepitude as opposed to subtracting from it. you are making marylanda better place