Thursday, September 18, 2008

A reminder: Today is JB's birthday bash at Melba's place

At a store in The Greatest Shopping District in America, not too far from Melba's place actually, a woman and I stood side by side browsing a display. She picked up a pair of earrings off the $0.85 rack and turned towards me.

"I always buy real jewelry for everything else, but not earrings." I just nodded. Not to be mean-spirited, but I had never seen more hair on a woman's face in my life, and it was really quite distracting.

She continued, "My grandson, every time he comes over, he eats one, guaranteed." I noticed that her bristly mustache half obscured her upper lip.

Either she didn't notice my involuntary staring or she was used to it and just kept speaking "He don't touch nothing else, but the first thing he does whenever he comes over is run straight into my room and eat an earring. And always only one out of a pair, just one!"

The hair on her cheeks was long enough that it almost looked soft. I forced my eyes away.

"So now I get gold on the rest of my jewelry and such, but I given up on nice earrings."

With that, she grabbed a handful of earrings and headed towards the register, leaving me wondering just how old her grandson is.

3 comments:

cupcake said...

wonder if the secret service knows Joe Biden is having a bash. maybe BO will show. Ohhhhhh! I may swoon.

OM said...

If my grandma had facial hair, I would also try to knock myself out every time I was forced to visit.

Mac said...

Hey Baltiless,

Have you heard about this one yet?

http://www.baltimoreexaminer.com/local/crime/121208laughbalt.html